From twitter threads to the inevitable follow-up op-ed’s, the latest tradition this Pride month has been to participate in the “Kink at Pride” discourse. One side thinks everyone within the LGBT community should be able to take pride in their sexual practices and lifestyle choices in public by dressing however they wish to. The other disagrees.
The discourse goes away and comes back around year after year. Even as 2020’s Pride marches and public events halted because of the pandemic, LGBT Twitter erupted after someone posted a since-deleted picture of his Pride outfit: a bandana tied around his thigh. An endless array of tweets followed in which members of the community discussed what should and shouldn’t be welcomed at an event many considered to be “family friendly.”
This year’s annual kink discourse began after the YouTuber, Vaush, wrote a thread on Twitter demanding that “kink at Pride” be limited to afterparties and alternative celebrations, away from the wider “family-friendly” Pride event. His claim gained traction after a picture resurfaced of a young girl petting “Pups,” a popular role-play in the leather community in which people dress and behave like dogs. Many centered critiques around not wanting to exclude minors from celebrations. However, that concern was quickly and largely shut down by many queer Twitter users who were better informed about the discourse.
Among other things, queer Twitter argued that the kink discourse is unnecessary because the arguments against “kink at Pride” are vague, uninformed and unpopular. They are vague because they ignore the fact that it is not the norm for the Kink community to partake in public sexual acts during Pride, so really all they are doing is policing how much leather some individuals should wear in front of children. Uninformed because they neglect how essential members of the BDSM/leather community have been to the foundation of Pride itself. And unpopular because even though the inflammatory “no kink at Pride” tweets received traction, it does not compare to the support tweets supporting kink at Pride.
Overall, the “Kink at Pride”discourse misses the mark and has become a punching bag opportunity for many to get hit-tweets by criticizing an argument that is already widely unpopular. So instead of adding to that echo-chamber, here are conversations much more important to have throughout the remainder of Pride month.
1. Pride’s Accessibility
Accessibility is one of the few salvageable points out of the “kink at Pride” discourse. But instead of accessibility to heteronormativity, a conversation needs to be had about the accessibility of Pride celebrations for the community’s disabled members. Pride events, largely held in public venues, are notoriously bad at ensuring handicapped or differently abled individuals have a way to participate. This is an incredible opportunity for able-bodied members of the LGBT community to use our privilege in order to uplift differently abled voices and ensure everyone can be celebrated equally.
2. Cops at Pride
Speaking of members of the community using their privilege to help those who are more marginalized, the discussion surrounding cops at Pride needs to be had. It had a brief moment in the limelight of Pride conversations after New York Pride announced several plans to decrease the presence of police forces at Pride celebrations–because, after all, Pride started out as a New York protest against police brutality the marginalized members of the LGBT community continue being subjected to. Seattle and Denver have lessened police presence at their respective Pride events as well. All eyes will be on New York Pride as many will search for the slightest misstep as an excuse to ensure cops remain present at Pride celebrations worldwide. Therefore, it is important that the demands of the removal of police force presence at Pride events continue across the country. New York’s decision is already receiving backlash, which means the argument against cops at Pride needs to be louder than ever.
3. #BlackTransLivesMatter
New York is also a city to watch in the aftermath of last year’s Black Trans Lives Matter march. 2020’s Pride season came about during the intersection of Pride events being cancelled because of the pandemic and the Black Lives Matter movement. This resulted in the community trading usual celebrations centering cis gay men for protests demanding justice and equality for the Black trans community. Now that public celebrations across U.S. cities have returned but the murder rate for Trans people in the U.S. is already set to surpass last year’s record number, will the community carry on last year’s solidarity with the Black trans community or will we go back to centering the community’s most privileged?
4. #FreePalestine
2021’s Pride season is similar to last year’s because it has come during a humanitarian crisis. This year, the Free Palestine movement is at the forefront. Protests have broken out across major U.S. cities, drawing attention to the Israeli occupation of Palestine and the current genocide of Palestinian people. Soon enough, these same streets will be used for Pride celebrations, but that doesn’t mean they can’t still be used to support Palestine. In the same way Pride protests for the Black Trans community can continue, our celebrations can make more than enough room to stand alongside occupied Palestine and stand on the right side of history.
5. Pride Worldwide
Finally, American LGBT people need to realize the privilege it is to live in a country where enough vaccines have been distributed in order to have a Pride celebration in the first place. Internationally, the COVID-19 pandemic has not made the same progress and many countries find themselves in worse positions than they did this time last year. We should not forget about the LGBT community worldwide just because we are able to celebrate again. Advocacy and efforts for vaccine distribution and pandemic relief across the global south and other countries being hit the worst by the coronavirus has a place within this year’s Pride celebrations. Queer people exist everywhere and this year is an amazing opportunity to stand in solidarity as what we are: an international community.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. The LGBT community has a myriad of issues much more important and worthy of our attention than continuing to beat the dead horse that is the “kink at Pride” discourse. Instead of engaging with it we must ask ourselves: what will we remember the 2021 Pride season for? Will it be dragging out the kink argument or will we unite in order to demand justice for the community’s most marginalized?
